Mother´s Day Resolutions
- I hereby
resolve to make my own bed; pick up my clothes; and take
out the trash the first time Mom asks.
- Dad
hereby resolves to compliment Mom on every meal she cooks,
and will regularly release her from kitchen duty by venturing
forth to prepare
a gourmet meal
entirely on his own..."Honey, where do you keep the frying pan?" is a phrase that will never again fall from the lips
of dear old Dad.
- I
hereby resolve to replace the kitchen accessories I have
pilfered over the past six months. This includes the spoons
hidden under my bed; the hot chocolate mugs in the back
seat of the car; and the spatula at the bottom of the swimming
pool. (I swear I don't know how it got there!)
-
Dad fought
the lawn and the lawn won. He hereby resolves to become
the master of his domain -- the back yard. He'll whack those
weeds; he'll prune those poinsettias; he'll...hmmm. What's
the lawn mower doing in John Junior's tree house?
- I hereby
resolve to walk around Mom's flowerbeds instead of through
them. And I'll never, ever kick the tops off the delphiniums
again.
- Dad
hereby resolves to paint the trim over the garage, immediately
following his workout at the golf course. This particular
fitness program lends itself perfectly to the development
of strong wrists - crucial when applying paint to the exterior
of Mom's carport.
- I hereby
resolve to remove the Tater Tots from the box before sticking
them into the oven, thereby reducing stress for Mom.
- Dad
hereby resolves to refrain from returning empty juice cartons
to the refrigerator -- at least until after Mother's Day.
- I
hereby resolve to watch him like a hawk.
Dad hereby resolves to simply remember his resolutions. A thinking cap might help.